Monday, December 17, 2007

The weekend

My weekend was quiet, relaxed and a bit of a blur... Feeling a lot better thankfully! Very gratefull to be coughing less and breathing easier. Energy still comes and goes a bit, but managed to get a lot of rest in.

Saw three friends this weekend, each one very unique. Seeing them got me thinking quite a bit though. It is interesting to observe the effect that my whole situation has had on my friendships... Actually, that is an understatement. Some of the reactions have upset me quite a bit, and I'm sure I'll be getting more suprises in the future. And I'll have to learn how to handle them.

The worst is having to go from being close to someone, to the other person just not really giving a damn, getting too caught up in their wildly exciting life to spare a few moments to send an e-mail or text message, nevermind making a phonecall, even if they know you're 'sick'. (they're most probably not reading this so don't start stressing thinking it may be you!!-however if you really think it might be you, just ask me) Then you get the people who you were always friends with, but not close friends, who've been great, and shown care and support all the way, making the friendship so much tighter. Next up is the weird group, although I generally don't deal with them myself, it's usually my friends or mom who have to face them. They're the people who fake an interest because it's the appropriate thing to do. They don't care how I'm doing or what exactly's wrong with me, but they ask anyway. And then finally, there's the group who's always been your best friends, who're still there for you all the way, and who have to put up with your moods and frustration and anger caused by all the groups of people just listed. To you guys I want to say thank you. If I sometimes act like a bitch, it's not you I'm angry with, it's the situation and all the people NOT supporting me... But rest assured... when I get those lungs and show my friends the time of their lives (you will have to pay for yourself though, I didn't win the lottery!), they won't be included!

So to conclude.. cf and especially transplant is the ultimate friend-o-meter (AND love-o-meter, but that's a story for a different day!), and at the end of the day it's a good thing. Who wants to waste time and energy on fake friends?

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