|I would've made the title 'bad day', but something that is potentially life-changing also seems to have happened today, so it's not all bad.|
I'm feeling horrible right now, all weak and trembling and feverish and tight chested! Not a good combination! I sent in some sputum (fancy term for mucus, pretty gross, but you'll get over it) on Monday. Phoned my doc today, and the results aren't back yet, but feeling the way I do and not wanting to feel like this for much longer I told him that I want to go on IV antibiotics (a drip in other words) TODAY!!! So my mom and I are off to the ER at St George's this afternoon. I don't know what to expect though, as previously my doc and I talked about getting a long-line/PICC line the next time I have to go on IV's.. I've never had one of those, and it sounds scary, and I can be quite a wuss when it comes to these type of things! (transplant's ideal for me then! Haha!) I will do an update on how it went.. hope my favourite nurse, Jackie is there!
The life-changing thing... I really can't say anything at the moment, as it's just a thought/idea. What I can say is that last night when I did some half-decent praying for the first time in quite a while, I told God that the two things I'm really scared of at the moment is not getting to JHB in time when I get the call for lungs (It's a 1hr 40min flight on a commercial airline, and 2.5hrs on charter plane. I've basically got 2-4hrs to get there! So it will be tight! And I can't stay in JHB, as the altitude makes it 10 times harder for me to breathe! I will need very high O2 support. And obviously my social and medical support system is here.) and the other thing is not getting lungs in time, or having an infection or something when I do get the call which means they probably won't do it. And the fact of the matter is they've only done about 3 lung transplants this year! Which scares me. So this morning I got a phonecall from a family friend, with the most unexpected story about a man who had 2 lung transplants who she met via her sister by coincedence! I phoned the guy and talked to him and it was SO INTERESTING! It felt like God might have been answering my prayer right there. Will keep you updated if this should lead to anything...
While on the topic of prayer.. One of my new transplant friends (she had hers in October) and I said last night how much our faith has helped us through all of this, and it's so true. And the most amazing part is that should the operation not happen in time or the new lungs are rejected, then we've got ETERNAL LIFE to look forward to anyway! So it's really a win-win situation for us. Whereas if you don't believe in God you have nothing. All you have is luck, and you have to put all your faith in people. And while there are brilliant people out there they make mistakes, and in the end they're just like you, with no real power whatsoever.
I will leave you now to go and cough some more and try to get myself ready for this afternoon..