Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Wednesday morning

So I had another bad dream last night. This time it involved no coughing, but lots of not-being-able-to-breathe-ness. I dreamt that we were having lunch at our neighbours in PE, and I was really battling to breathe. Like when I used to feel after I haven't coughed or nebulised for a few hours, very tight-chested. And I was struggling to eat, which is what used to happen then. And I was getting anxious about getting home, stressing about having to walk ALL THE WAY NEXT DOOR.... When I woke up I had to take a few deep breaths, because it still felt like I was battling! So I went for another run/walk this morning, and went a bit further than last week, just to make sure the dream wasn't real!

The strange thing that I have realised though is that when I'm awake, I can't remember what it felt like struggling like that! Seriously, I try to remember, but it's hard. I remember my limitations and all the things I loathed, like climbing stairs, but I can't quite pinpoint how my breathing FELT. However, when I dream about not being able to breathe or coughing up blood, I know EXACTLY what it feels like and it's SO REAL. It's like my brain remembers it and wants to remind me. Which I am thankfull for, quite frankly. It reminds me to thank God for these beautiful lungs and appreciate them to the full!

Yesterday was quite cool, went to visit my surgeon, haven't seen him in ages! And the guy who came up and talked to me at church, Craig, came for coffee! Well, we had loadshedding, so technically speaking he came for juice (and cookies), lol! So excited about making friends here!!! After that my dad and I went out for supper to celebrate my 3 months post tx. And of course the power was still off so I couldn't cook (yay!) This afternoon Peter is coming for coffee (or juice if he wants, lol!) and tomorrow afternoon I've got an interview with the Sunday Independant!!! About winning the blog award. Hopefully I'll get to see the article on-line (and post a link!), as we're going to be in PE on Sunday and don't get the paper there!

Oh and the pic of the cat is just because I miss her so much and can't wait to see both of them on Saturday! On the photo she is being very naughty, lying in my room where she's not allowed to be anymore! Just look at that face... you gotta love her!


mizasiwa said...

i have taged you in on a meme i hope you dont mind... not sure if you got my comment a few days ago so glad you found a church!! yor articles are very good - well done!! looking forward to meeting you sometime too.

Gizela said...

Weet bors trek sommer vir jou part toe wanneer jy sulke drome het. Ek kan net dink hoe erg en vreesaanjaend dit moet wees. Mag die drome met die tyd saam minder word.
Hoop die res van jou dag was lekker.
Groete G

Bree said...

NICE! Those dreams certainly are a bitch eh - you're on MSN so i'll just tell you there! It must be nice to wake from that horrible dream tho!

And you're cat looks cute!